Perhaps it’s the change in weather, frustration with not meeting a goal quickly or just overall blah’s – most of us could use more confidence.

You see: I have always had a problem going “hell yeah I’m awesome!” I might be slightly happy with myself for a brief moment, but that everlasting sense of being an overall great person worthy of praise is something I haven’t been able to develop.

When you dissect things down, we all have done awesome things, are awesome friends, awesome children, awesome parents, etc. We’re awesome humans.

We have compassion, empathy, love, caring, and greatness within us. Why can’t we run around and shout it from the rooftops?

Personally, I always worried that if I “owned” my awesomeness, it would come across as selfish. Someone said this last week and it has stuck in my head every day since:

Confidence is not narcissism.

Inherently, I know this. I admire confident people and always wish I could be like them. So I am practicing confidence – and I ask you to also.

This isn’t some formal project. I just want to be able to round up the collective of our awesomeness. If we all can say out loud (or on the interwebz) WHY we have the right to be confident, won’t that help others feel comfortable to be confident also? (Or, we could all turn into a bunch of raving loons – I’m willing to take that chance).

So, share with the world: on your blog, in the comments here, on Twitter, on Facebook: Why are you awesome? Why do you have the right to be confident? Give me examples! Here are a few of mine:

• I am confident because I am smart.
• I am confident because I finished a half marathon.
• I am confident because I am a good writer.
• I am confident because I am an awesome wife.

Who is with me?!

The numbers of progress aren’t always on the scale.

This week, I’ve been sick. Fever, shaky, dizzy, lightheaded. By the time I made it to the doctor yesterday, I had missed 2 days of work this week.

One thing that REALLY perked me up?

Pulse, 60. Blood pressure,112/72. Fat and fit blowing up stereotypes at the doctor's office!

June 23, 2011 10:48 am via TweetCaster for AndroidReplyRetweetFavorite

@skinnyemmie

Emily Sandford

Normal pulse is between 60-100. Normal blood pressure is less than 120/80. Look at me! This 300+ pound fit and fat girl really IS fit! Hot-cha-cha!

Turns out I have an inner ear infection which is causing vertigo. I apparently had some kind of bug that turned into an infection thus the fever and shaking. Antibiotics and taking it easy a few days will help.

So anyway, my quick reminder for Friday: there are other numbers besides the scale that can help you measure your progress. Because in the end, isn’t it all about health?

Gayla Bentley Traditional Tunic

So, after goose-egging last week (that means a big-fat-zero pounds lost, kids), I thought I might be losing momentum or my body was going to go into one of its revolts it sometimes has, where it just plain refuses to lose weight. Hopes weren’t high this week. I was super busy this past week and was eating on the run a lot, ate out at restaurants and generally wasn’t drinking the gallon of water per day that I normally do.

I focused on the positive this week in knowing that smaller clothes were fitting and I’ve got a big change coming up here in a couple of weeks that I’ll reveal later (not really as top-secret or dramatic as it sounds!) so I’ve been focusing on positivity.

Low and behold, hopped on the scale this morning and saw a number that is NOT the same as last week!

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds
Week 11: -2 pounds
Week 12: -3 pounds
Week 13: +1 pound
Week 14: -4 pounds
Week 15: 0 (to the tenth of a pound)
Week 16: -3 pounds
Week 17: -3 pounds

Total lost: 41! pounds 

Can I get a “whoop! whoop!” for hitting 40 pounds? This means I’ve averaged 2.4 pounds per week since I started, which is more than I expected. It’s amazing that when you find out a program that works for you how easy it can be. It’s also amazing how even after recognizing accomplishment like this that it is so easy to get glum-in-an-instant. My clothes still aren’t fitting like I want them to, so it makes the number of the scale feel less significant. MUST STOP INSANITY. I’m happy for the 41 pounds, and will only think positive thoughts today.

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds
Week 11: -2 pounds
Week 12: -3 pounds
Week 13: +1 pound
Week 14: -4 pounds
Week 15: 0 (to the tenth of a pound)
Week 16: -3 pounds

Total lost: 38 pounds

This is more like it! I peeked on the scale Monday (BAD EMMIE!) and saw I was down 4, so thought I’d hit the 40 pound mark today, but my body being its finnickey self decided to fight back. Feel great though. This week I resisted alcoholic temptations and did pretty good about eating “pure.” Hopefully I’ll see 40 next week!

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds
Week 11: -2 pounds
Week 12: -3 pounds
Week 13: +1 pound
Week 14: -4 pounds

Total lost: 35 pounds!

To make up for the unfortunate weight gain last week, I had to make minor adjustments to bring me back to the higher weight loss levels. Minimal alcohol, minimal eating out (and when I did eat out, it was mainly bunless burgers- nearly zero carbs), lots of water. Worked like a charm!

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds
Week 11: -2 pounds
Week 12: -3 pounds
Week 13: +1 pound

Total lost: 32 31 pounds

Well hell. I had a bad feeling about this week and I was right. Mr. Scale says I gained a pound this week. #^*$#^! What am I going to do to fix this next week?

• GO GROCERY SHOPPING! I ate out the majority of the week, silly me. I know from previous experience when I eat out for dinners especially, it never pans out like I want it to. Things that may seem “clean” and “lowcarb” actually can have hidden sugars, flours, cornstarches, etc.
• JUST SAY NO! to beer. I drank a good amount of Michelob Ultra this week. Problem is, your body goes to burn the alcohol first, so fat takes the back seat. No matter how lowcarb MichUltra is, if you drink 5 of them in 1 night, you’ve had more than half your carbs consumed for the day. So friends, do me a favor and don’t let me enjoy a cold one this week.
• WATER WATER WATER! I haven’t done well on my water consumption at all this week. And by not well, I mean nearly none at all. Yesterday I drank a little over half a gallon in a 2 hour period because I was trying to play “catch-up.” Doesn’t work that way.

On happier notes- because of my devestation of the weight GAIN this week, I measured myself. Here are the totals, from when I first started my journey 13 weeks ago:

Neck: -0.75 inches
Wrist: -0.5 inches
Bust: -3.5 inches
Band (under bust): -4.5 inches
Waist: -6 inches
Hips: -5.25 inches
Upper Arm: -3.25 inches

TOTAL INCHES LOST: 23.75!!!

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds
Week 11: -2 pounds
Week 12: -3 pounds

Total lost: 32 pounds!!

I am so excited to have passed the 30 pound mark, but there is SO MUCH FURTHER I need to go. Must remember to practice what I preach and focus on how far I’ve come, not dwell on how far I need to go.

Anyone is welcome to do the happy dance with me. I did it on the scale this morning. Nekkid. Glad no one saw that.

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds
Week 11: -2 pounds

Total lost: 29 pounds

While I wish I had a bigger loss than 2 pounds this week, I had a few great “wins” in my book.
1) 2 pretty non-observant people observed that I have lost weight
2) I ‘feel’ smaller
3) my insane foot and leg swelling has gone away!

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
Week 8 (7/20 because I left for vacation):  -2 pounds
Week 9 (7/30): 0 (nothing gained on vacation!)
Week 10: -3 pounds

10 week total: -27 pounds!!!

I know I normally weigh on Thursdays, but since I’m about to embark on vacation tonight, I thought I’d hop on the scale to see how I’ve done so far this week.

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 : -5 pounds
Week 7: -1 pound
1/2 week 8 (today):  -2 pounds

7 1/2 week total: -24 pounds!!

Ruby Gettinger

How did I not know about this show until now? Seriously. As much of a freak as I am about reality tv, much less anything with a plus size star in it, I should have been all over this a year ago.

For those who don’t know, Ruby is a reality documentary of the life of Ruby Gettinger, a formerly 700+ pound vibrant gal about my age (and about my height) who is on her way to losing the weight and figuring out the reasons behind her getting so large in the first place. I believe she started her Ruby journey around the 460 pound mark, and is down over 100 pounds through the first season and beginning the 2nd.

In addition to Ruby being about my age and my height, she is from Savannah, GA, where my momma is from. I was born in Augusta, GA and spent lots of time in Savannah, so when Ruby has a visit to one of Savannah’s finest candy shoppes, I can truly relate (because those caramel apples are damn good).

There are so many things I love about Ruby. She has broken into the main stream media and has exposed herself and the struggles of being so large and nearly every word out of her mouth I can relate to. I feel like she’s some long lost fat sister who I just want to jump through the TV and hug and cry with. She was on Ryan Seacrest’s morning radio show today and a girl called in saying how Ruby made her realize that people who are overweight aren’t lazy or whatever- they’re people just the same as she is, and shouldn’t be treated differently. The photogs over at TMZ even had her on their site a couple of days ago with fans coming up to her in LA and her just being so sweet and appreciative. Love it.

Check out a 2 minute clip that could have easily been me. I share all of Ruby’s fears, frustrations and embarrassment over situations like this:

I just ordered the Ruby DVD which has episodes from season 1 on it. I would like to watch it with friends so they might be able to better understand the feelings and struggles that go on with being so large.

Ruby is on the Style network at 8pm on Sundays (but is also re-played all the time on that network).  I hope I can live my life with as much determination and zest that Ruby does, no matter what weight I’m at.

It’s been a busy week with various obligations and running around. Put on some pants yesterday and they actually felt looser, so I gave myself a little measurement check today.

I know normally guys only measure their necks, and no one measures their wrists, but I like jewelry so it affects what lengths of each I have to buy!

DRUMROLL PLEASE….

Neck:  -.25
Wrist:  -.25
Bust:  -2.5
Band (under bust): -.25
Waist: -3.5
Hips: -3
Upper Arm: -2.5

Total Lost: -12.25 inches!!!

WOOT! :p

Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4: -5 pounds
Week 5: -1 pound
Week 6 (today): -5 pounds

6 week total: -21 pounds

I am very happy with my progress. Woke up this morning actually feeling like my body is changing. Didn’t wake up sore from last night’s work out, and I can tell my endurance is slowly but surely getting better. Thanks for the support!!!

I LOVE Beth Ditto. Seriously. Love.her.hard.

The frontwoman of The Gossip has an amazing voice and punk rock attitude. And she’s fat. And fierce. She’s become an unabashed face of fashion for women of abundance, showing up front row at fashion shows and having straight size designers jump at the chance to fit her in something. Now, she can add “designer” to her reproitoire, as she has designed a line for UK-based Evans (and yes, you can order online if you’re in the States!) This announcement that came in my email today made me literally squeal out loud. Sorry co-workers.

Beth Ditto, Evans email

This is a fabulous article about her. Some excerpts:

“Her body is mesmeric. Rolls and folds topped with an adorable heart-shaped face. Having never had the least desire to paint, I’m suddenly overcome with an urge to take up oils and have a bash at capturing the play of light across her love handles. No wonder she’s a muse to just about every designer going…”

““In case you were wondering, these are real,” she says, cupping her boobs. “But this,” she continues, grabbing a shelf of tummy flab, “is implants.” She honks with laughter and pulls her top back on.”"

From one Southern fat girl to another (she’s from Arkansas)… Rock on sista!

Check out The Gossip’s latest hit, Heavy Cross:

Guess I should update on my progress!
Start Date: 5.28.09

Week 1: -8 pounds
Week 2: -2 pounds
Week 3: 0 (boo!)
Week 4 (today): -5 pounds
Total: -15 pounds

*does a happy dance*

I was stalled until today, when I had what is affectionatley known as the “whooshie-fairy” visit me overnight to usher me into weight loss mode. I had been very swollen in my legs and feet, and I think exercise helped me with that yesterday as I’m not nearly as swollen today.

Wow, what an amazing story of hitting rock bottom and making your way back up to the top. Everyone, no matter what their weight, can learn something about persaverence from this story.

Suicidal at 575 pounds, she now weighs 165
‘Food addict’ needed trach tube to breathe; lost 410 pounds without surgery

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31485523/ns/today_health-diet_and_nutrition/