So why now?

May 26, 2010

I got asked this question today and I know many people must think it, but are too shy to ask.

Why weight loss now? What’s different this time?

If you’re going through a weight loss journey right now, have you asked yourself this? Can you answer it concisely? If not, there may be a problem.

I’ve tried to lose weight my whole life. I literally can’t remember back to a time where I wasn’t trying to lose weight. Grow up fat, and it’s ingrained in your head that you’re trying to lose weight- even if you aren’t really trying. When I had my week of shame a while back, in my head, I was telling myself I was still on a weight loss journey.

I really had to think about how to explain to people why this time is different. Why, out of all the hundreds of other times I’ve attempted to lose weight, this time will work. I’ll be honest. Thinking about this make me a freakin’ mess. Am I setting myself up to fail? Am I going to disappoint people if I don’t end up making my goal this time? Am I doomed to live like this forever?

To hell with it. If I disappoint people, I can guarantee them that I’ve disappointed myself even more. Their shame will have nothing on mine. Not that I think I will fail.

So here’s my why:

My mom died at age 50 from Parksinson’s Disease. She spent the last years of her life unable to walk. At my heaviest weight, I never felt like walking. How can someone in their mid-twenties feel so much like someone who should be confined to a nursing home? I sincerely felt that way most days. As I approach my 30th year in this life, I have to own up to myself that only I can make the change. Only I can do this for myself. No one can save me from myself.

In short, this is my life to lose and I’m willing to fight like hell for it.

I’m doing it. I’m doing it now. This time will work, because my life is WORTH living. The life I have now is void of experiences I’ve put off my entire life. Check out my 101 in 1001 list I posted yesterday. The list is FULL of experiences that are dependent upon my weight loss and increased confidence. I refuse to hold my husband back from doing fun things because of my size. I refuse to feel like an outcast in society. I refuse to throw in the towel.

There you go. My reasons.

What are yours? Why is this time different?

Tagged as: motivation, weight loss

  • http://lessofmimi.wordpress.com Melissa Fritcher

    This time is different because my body finally told me in no uncertain terms that it was tired of my waffling (ha!) on the issue of LC. My pancreas was dying. My blood sugars were approaching 400. I passed out one day. My vision was blurring. I felt like death and I was heading there with my unhealthy lifestyle. I was tired of worrying if my heart was going to explode in my chest trying to keep up with my children. I knew that at the rate I was going I wouldn’t be alive to see them grown. This time is different because I can’t go back. I was so bad off, that going back means committing suicide. I have too damn much to live for.

  • http://bedeliciouslyhealthy.blogspot.com Brittany

    Gosh, I feel like I wrote this post! You took the words right out of my heart!

  • http://midlifeswimmer.blogspot.com/ Stacia

    I read that you swam over at Stephens blog and came to check you out :)

  • http://diaryofcurvyjones.com Curvy Jones

    I don't know that I feel like this time is any different than any other time. I've been fat a long, long time. I'm just I guess hoping I stay on the horse a little longer every time.

  • http://www.facebook.com/mooreemilie Emilie Moore

    I have totally started my 101 list! LOVE this idea! Thus far, mine are weight/reward related! For example, the weight limit to go skydiving is 240 pounds, to ride a mule at the Grand Canyon is 200 pounds. When I am down 100 pounds I plan to get a new tattoo! So excited to come up with new “things” too!!

  • Shelley

    Great post and I wish you the best. I think it also comes down to the Dr. Philism – “what's in it for you?” What do you gain from being fat? I'm a fat girl from a fat family. I weighed almost 300 at high school graduation. I had gastric bypass ten years later, I gained half of what I lost back (and never lost it all to begin with). But, its not about “diet” for me. It's about this cage my weight creates for me. It's safe in a cage, my energy trapped, yet desperate to get out. So, instead of dieting, I'm experiencing little by little what is outside of that cage – the vulnerability, the potential, the power. I'm hoping my spirit will realize the cage isn't needed anymore. Instead of focusing on the cage, I'm focusing on what's outside of it. So far, it seems to be working. But, yes, it's a journey.

  • http://www.skinnyemmie.com skinnyemmie

    Stacia I just added your blog to my Feed reader! I have got to read more about your program. I plan on incorporating lap swimming into my new fitness routine. I used to be a fish, and now am more of a whale.

  • http://mayorofthebux.com danielle

    So true about disappointing yourself more. I use to say I didn't want to lose weight because I didn't want to have the odd shape that people have when they are losing weight. I know it was just an excuse. Love your list, I did a post similar to that recently. It's amazing the kind of life I “want” to lead. I need to remember that I am currently living as well. Love your space over here!

  • http://twitter.com/beautifulbecky Becky Danto

    I lost the weight for me..my kids and my hubby. I wanted to feel good about who I was and am! I felt like i hit rock bottom when I couldn't jump on the trampoline my little one got for his birthday… I knew I neeeded to make the change!!!

  • http://www.NoMorePlusSize.com/ Tishia – No More Plus Size

    Great post! The reason it's going to work this time around is because for onc

  • Pingback: Making time for a workout — Skinny Emmie

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